Isn't It Verdant?

Song of the Day: "I So Hate Consequences" Relient K
Accessory of Awesome: my verdant shirt

Let me start out by saying: Nine more freakin days.

Ok, now that I'm done with that, I can move on to what's important in life. Like my verdant shirt. Have you ever heard of college humor? Well they are a bunch of nerds who make videos, some of which are not very appropriate so don't go and watch them and come to me whining about how your mind was defiled and it's my fault. It's actually your fault. So heed my warning: "DON'T WATCH THEM IF YOU DON'T LIKE HEARING CUSSING, SEX JOKES, SEXIST JOKES, OR BAD....STUFF!!"

Other than that, they are hilarious. My dad found one that has Zelda (from Legend of Zelda the video game amazingness) and Princess Peach (from Mario Brothers) arguing about which of their men are better.

(the video)

In this video, Link say's his new tunic is "verdant".


Then I got a shirt a couple days ago which looks like Link's tunic only kind of more girlish. This may or may not be the reason I bought it... BUT it is also verdant and when I got home my dad greeted me with the line from the video.


That is my life... I spend all day cracking nerdy jokes with my dad and having everyone stare at us because it makes little sense to people who don't spend the majority of their time reading books and/or comic books and watching crappy sci-fi movies.


Of anyone says I'm not a nerd, just watch me with my dad. If we're talking and then seemingly burst into laughter for no reason...it's probably because something reminded us of a comic book, movie, or 24.


Now I have a verdant top though! Yay me!


Have I mentioned I'm almost sixteen?


(I'm almost sixteen.)


It's so weird. I remember so clearly a few years ago when Megan, Abby and I sat in church talking about how one day we'd all be able to drive and be so cool just like the older girls in youth group.
Now were here...and we're all sixteen...with the exception of me because I'm the youngest. But almost! I'm almost sixteen!


So much has changed. It's only been a few years. Megan isn't here anymore. I pass her house almost every day. I haven't seen her since Abby's sixteenth birthday party. I haven't spoken to her in months. It's hard to keep in touch with someone when you don't know anything about each other anymore. Doesn't that suck?!


You'd think that with all the technology we had we'd be able to make a transporter beam so we could go visit people in an instant! That'd be fantastic.


I have to go see an adulterer who wants to examine my mouth for parasites now. That's right. I'm going to the dentist. He always seems to be having affairs with the other ladies who work at the office with him. It's really disgusting...considering he's actually really creepy looking. People make me sick.
Oh well. I'm glad I got to share about my verdant shirt and increasing age. Talk to you soon!

 Until the atmosphere pops...which hopefully never happens,

Christina

All I Want For Christmas Is...

Song(s) of the Day: "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey
                                   "Safe and Sound" by Taylor Swift (from the Hunger Games sound track)
                                   "Wait for Me" by Shane Harper
Accessory of Awesome: my new shirt! (Who Let the Nerds Out?)

Wow...I have had an excellent Christmas.

Christmas seems to have lost its magical shine from when I was a kid. But it's still wonderful. I woke up this morning and the first thoughts through my mind were these:

"It's Christmas..." and "In thirteen days I'll be able to see Vito."

Yeah. I'm pathetic like that. Ha! But both were equally true, so it's not that bad now is it?

Melissa, Nathan, and I spent the night upstairs in the "play room". It's the room we keep the comic books, wii, video games, and old VHS tapes in. Melissa and I slept on the sofa and Nathan slept on the floor because he's a boy and can tough it out.

He would've been touching it out, but actually he slept on a memory foam mattress...so he was probably more comfortable than we were.

Anyways, we woke up and chilled up there for a long time. My family has a long standing tradition when we wait for mom to make the downstairs magical, and then we go down stairs. Mom used to do it so she could video tape us coming down the stairs with huge grins on our faces, wearing our new PJs. Now she just does it because she needs more time to sleep and make breakfast.

Our nine foot tree was glimmering with lights. Music played out of the sound system my dad adores in our living room. We sat around on the sofa and I got read the Christmas story this year. And, knowing how horrible a person I am, I... IMPROVISED!!! Oh my. Sin.

(For those of you who don't know, it's technical a sin to add on to the Bible. I wasn't actually adding on to the Bible, I was just joking around. But...that's beside the point.)

We each got to open our stockings, in which I found a lot of candy I have yet to sink my teeth into and a few little toys. My favorite was the ADD string. You've heard of ADD blocks, right? Well this is the same thing...only a string!

To put it simply, it satisfied my ADD for a long time. I just sat there and played with it.

We ate breakfast, which was immensely satisfying. Since we still had a while before we left for church, Nathan and I handed out our gifts. I'm glad to say that my gifts were enjoyed. I'm glad Melissa liked the art books I got her because I was pretty darn scared she'd hate them. Haha!

We headed to church and I had a blast. I mean, every week I have fun just because it's church. But this week, all my college friends were there and everyone was smiling. I had so much fun.

All the older kids from my youth group who have graduated and moved onto college resemble my extended siblings. So they pick on my a lot. Luke, Brian, Garrett, Daniel, Charles, Kevin, Noelle, Shannon, Jessie, and assorted members from the church make up my closest friends. It sounds pretty silly. But I love them all. They made me laugh so hard during church.

After church we went back home and opened up the rest of our presents. I am now enjoying the comfort of several pairs of socks, slippers, and PJs. Along with these, I received a study bible, a flipcam, many iTunes gift cards, and Dr. Who season 6. I also got a couple notebooks and pens which will fill up rather rapidly...

So, over all, I HAD THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER! In ya'lls FACES! Haha!

I hope you all had great Christmases as well. I'm praying each one of you has a blessed day and week and month... and you know....forever. Keep Christ in Christmas, ladies and gentlemen.

Until Davey stops coming over to my house for Dr. Who,

Christina

Confession

I feel like I've done this before on this blog. But I don't think I have. Anyways, you didn't start reading this to hear me talk about deja vu. You came to hear my confession.

Confession One: I am a liar.

Confession Two: I am a hypocrite.

Confession Three: I hate who I have been and I plan on changing.

Confession Four: I am very, VERY new at this apparently.

You probably need an explanation for all of that.

For the past several weeks, maybe months, I have been doubting my faith. I have been failing my King, my Creator. I was angry and resentful. I hated everyone. I hated even God. I hated everything and myself.

Myself expecially.

It disgusts me how much of a liar I am. I started a bible study with Davey and Josh, and still I doubted. I pointed people back to the bible even though I didn't listen to the bible or care what it said. I gave off the impression that I was happy and loving God and that everything was fine, which is hasn't been for quite a while.

Tonight, on top of everything that has been on top of my shoulders, it dawned on me. I didn't even believe God was real anymore. I didn't trust Him or see Him or feel Him or have Him.

I admitted this to my small group at youth group. In front of these girls I respect and love, I admitted that I had doubts about God right now. I had no idea who I was or who God was or what was going to happen to me when I died.

Mrs. Bacon gave me some verses to read. I read them sure. I looked at them once she gave them to me and I got more frustrated because they were things I'd read since I was a child. They were things I knew by heart. They were either that or things that I couldn't make sense of, which was even worse. I wrote it down in my journal and set about blogging.

This was a blog I didn't publish. But it was basically a rant. I very angry, hurt, and depressed rant about how God was doing nothing in my life. How my life was messed up and disgusting and God didn't seem to care.

I finished it with some insults at my friends and family, fed up with them not noticing that I was falling apart. And then I deleted it and fell onto my bed in tears.

I was so messed up. I was angry and resentful and hurting and it was all my fault, and I knew that. But I was blaming it on anyone I could. I was blaming it on my friends who "should've" noticed even though I've been living a lie for the past few months. I was blaming my parents, who have done nothing but try to help me. I blamed God for leaving me here, in the middle of my sin and anguish and pain.

I sat there on my bed and sobbed. I didn't know who I was or what God was or what would happen to me if I died right then. I lay there, curled up in a ball, angry and crying. I was sure I was going to stay like that all night.

Then Graycen texted me, offering to listen when I needed it because she'd understand. I'm ashamed to stay I started laguhing. I laughed this angry, hollow laugh through my tears.

"Like you'd understand anything about me." I'd whispered, still laughing and still crying. I texted her back, saying that I doubted she would understand.

She didn't give up. She texted back and said that she was there if I needed to talk. She said that sh'ed been to counseling and could help. And I laughed again, the same disgusting sound as before. Because if anyone knows anything about counseling, I do.

I told her it didn't work and that, aside from the fact it didn't work, I was a liar and a hypocrite and no one would want to help me.

She told me she forgave me and that God loved me. She told me I could find answers.

She didn't even know! She didn't know that'd I'd basically been lying to the whole school for months, convincing them I was a good person! She didn't know that I'd been hypocritical to her and to my classmates and to my friends. But she forgave me?

I started crying again. Because I was sure I couldn't find answers. I told her that too. I said that I was trying to find answers but I was scared because I didn't know what to do or where to turn or if God was even real.

She quoted John 16:33 to me. "I have told you these things tht you may have peace in the world, you will have trouble but take heart. I have overcome this world."

I was crying harder then, because I didn't feel God. All I felt was a pressure of darkness, anger, shame, and fear around me. I was terrified. I was crying so hard I thought my head was going to burst. I was so scared I wanted to call for someone to hold me, but I couldn't.

I heard voices whisper that I'd have to let things go that I loved. I'd have to let people go if I wanted to follow God. Now I see it was the devil trying to get me to stop asking questions, but at the time I was just overcome with fear and I said out loud, "You can't have him." Over and over, I said that. I was so scared I couldn't move.

I told her that God wasn't there. I told her that I couldn't feel him.

She told me that we all go through times where we can't find God. But He's still there. She said that He is God, the creator and He has a purpose for our lives. She said that God has all the right answers and that He only tests us to make sure we stay faithful. Our pain and fear we feel now won't last. Eventually we die and we go to heaven or hell.

I asked how I could know for sure I was going to heaven, because honestly I didn't really know.

I'm not going to say I got saved, because I got saved a while ago when I was younger. But I definitly rededicated my life to the Lord tonight.

What have a learned? I haven't learned anything new neccesarily, because I've been hearing this since I was a kid. But I know a few things now. That God is always there, no matter what. I know that I am definitly going to heaven.

Sure I still have questions. I'm going out with one of my friends on Tuesday to ask some of them. But I'm ready now. I know God's here. He has a plan for my life and it's a big one. It's always a big one, for everyone.

I have so much to learn. They say the closer you are to God, the more you realize how sinful you are. I feel pretty disgusting right now, but God forgave me. All I can do now if follow what He has to say, and look for more answers to my questions.

Till my search ends, which will be never,

Christina

Thanksgiving

I'm thankful for a number of things this year. God has blessed me so much. I let myself believe sometimes that my life isn't wonderful. Sometimes I let the devil tell me that life could be better. But in all honesty, it couldn't be. God obviously has me here, which is the best it can get. I have a house, clothes, food, heating, AC, and a family. My friends are amazing.

I'll just list off some stuff I'm thankful for:

• My family, who are unconditionally here for me even if we get into fights a lot.
• My best friend in the world, Abby, whom without I would surely loose my insanity and go sane. I love her so much.
• The four peers, Davey, Seth, Logan, and Jeremy. Without them we'd still have a wild Ian in our school and I would be without four of my best guy friends.
• My lunch table which consists of Logan, Davey, Alex, Austin, Payne, Chris, Gumsan, Caleb, and sometimes Josh. If I didn't have them, I would have no one to tell me about the Pope, video games, Rigil, or sports. I would also not have as much food in my belly. So, thanks for not making fun of my crazy ideas and letting me be your friend, guys.
• My youth group, who picks me up and helps me along when ever I need them too. They make me smile when I feel like crying and they are always there for me.
• My school in general. Even though we have drama, some of the teachers get on my nerves, and we have to wear these silly uniforms...it's still the best school ever. We really do actually care about each other and we really do have Christ in our school. Love you guys!
• All my friends from camp! I love you guys so much. Your all insane.
• All my friends from Canada! You guys are the best people in the world. You made my stay in PEI the best ever. Brandon, Jordan, Reice, MacKenzie, Bailey, Jeremy, Jessica, Tibor, Sherlyn, John, and Melissa. You guys are the best.
• GREEN M&M's!!! Nuff' said.

So yeah. That's just some stuff I'm thankful for. Had to post something eventually.

Until my class ring stops being AWESOME,

Christina

Grey Areas

Has anyone noticed that the longer your alive, the more grey areas there seem to be. When your a kid, your taught right and wrong. Your parents say going out after dark is bad, its bad. Your parents say smoking, drinking, and drugs is wrong, you create yourself a little world where you keep all of those things out. Your just a little kid, you don't know anything. So its an easy thing to do. Sure you may not want to sometimes, but it doesn't matter. Your parents are your parents. They'll spank you.

Then you grow up. You grow up and realize your parents can't spank you. You hear that drugs and drinking and smoking isn't bad all the time. Just sometimes. But you remember what your parents say and stay away from it. But now, your curiosity is peaked. You think, "Hey...maybe its not all bad. I'm not going to do it. But it doesn't seem as awful as mom and dad said."

Underage drinking and underage smoking is so normal now-a-days that people expect teenagers to be smoking, drinking, and doing drugs. We're not all like that, but its how they view us. But now, those of us that are the minority are kind of starting to wonder...

Is it as bad as it looks?

Let me start here in the section of this blog where I seem smart.

First of all, ALL UNDERAGE DRINKING AND SMOKING IS STUPID! There are laws for a reason. Its just to protect us...well some of the laws are to protect us. Not all of them. But these are here to protect us. A fourteen year old kid can not handle beer very well. A sixteen year old girl should not be telling me stories about how she got wasted on a bottle of Jack Daniels and some vodka. (Why is she not dead?! THAT'S WAY TO MUCH ALCOHOL FOR HER 90 POUND FRAME!!!)

Second, drinking and smoking in excess is also stupid. Drinking until your get totally wasted and can't remember what happened last night or getting so drunk you sleep with someone then wake up next to them without any memory about how you got there is completely and utterly idiotic in every way possible. Smoking until you sound like an old car engine? Um...that just doesn't seem appealing to me at all. Do you want to die of lung cancer and sound like a broken down car? I don't really think you do.

Third, drugs in general is also retarded. To start out they're kind of, sort of illegal. So that's a problem. Another problem is that they turn you into a stupid person basically. One of my favorite lines from a book I read was when two kids were talking about smoking. One was smoking a cigarette and one was smoking weed. The pot head looks at the girl who's smoking and says, "You know, smoking weed is a lot more healthy for you." The girl answers, "I may die young, but at least I won't die stupid. (That's John Greens, "Looking For Alaska", which is an excellent book aside from the cussing and those two scenes that I skipped.)

The important thing is, to think before you do something. Being impulsive can get you killed.

Look, I have friends who smoke. I have friends who drink. I have friends who do drugs or have done drugs. I have friends who do all bloody three. The ones who are stupid about it, I don't give them my time. They aren't worth it. The ones who do it in moderation I respect a little more. People who do drugs, I'm just there to try to get them to stop doing it.

These are the grey areas though! As Christians we have to decide where we draw the line. Obviously, the line for drugs should be way far away from it. Drugs are bad. Don't do them. THEY'RE ILLEGAL.

Drinking? Some Christians put their line with drinking right with their drug line. Which is OK. And then their are Christians who drink. If your a Christian, you should know better than to get wasted. But an occasional drink is not going to kill you if you do it wisely.

Smoking? Some Christian's think is OK. Some don't. I don't have much to say about that one. My opinion on the matter is that, as long as you don't smoke in excess it's OK. Cigars on holidays? That's OK too. Pipes? Since my best guy friends think their cool, I'm obligated to think so as well.

Just be smart. Don't do something stupid for the moment it makes you feel good. There are plenty of other ways to make yourself feel better that don't involve poisoning yourself slowly.

Until my opinions don't matter to me anymore,

Christina

PS

That won't ever happen by the way...the part about my opinions not mattering to me. They may stop mattering to you, but not to me.

NAMING THINGS IS HARD

So I've been trying to revamp this whole blog. I really want to delete this blog and just start a new one. But the problem is, I don't have any good names.

Names have always been a problem for me. Names for people, cars, places, books, stuffed animals, songs, and anything else that generally needs a name.

I name books all the time. Heartbeats.Search for Serenity.Childhood Lost.

I name stuffed animals. Remy the monkey, Clyde the ninja ferret/wombat/opossum thing, Goober the zebra. (actually, my military history teacher named Goober. Mr. Melton is just so cool.)

I name my wall...just don't ask me, OK? I was grounded and there was nothing to do!

I name inanimate objects. Ceniph my computer. Caden my guitar. Tigger the church van.

I name a lot of other things. As you can tell, those names are (for the lack of a better word) very strange. So I've been thinking through quite a few names for the blog. Here are a few:

1. Christina's Guide to the Four Peers

2. A Guide to High School, Life, and Everything

3. Ten Reasons Why

4. Life, Love, and High School

5. Cup Full of Sweet Water

Some of them need explaining and I'm too tired to do that. So, tell me what I should name the new blog! I think "Falling in the Black" is WAY to dark and dreary for my life. I mean, sure, my life sucks sometimes. But it's life. It's amazing too.

Until the mystery meat at Durham runs out,

Christina

If You Fear Sanity...Don't Read This

Song of the Day: "The Only Exception" Paramore
Accessory of Awesome: the goth look I've been pulling off with amazing amazingness
Irrational Irritation: the fact that my lips keep getting chapped

I have neglected this blog for so long. I feel like a bad person. But those of you who read this see me almost every day anyway. For those of you who don't...I'm sorry. Ha ha!

I've been very busy with this horribly creation called "homework" which these things called "teachers" give you when they want to torment you with their subject while your away from them.

OK not really. They have been LOADING it on this past month though. It's disgusting. It's like they decided all at the same time to kill us with homework. I think my backpack may break my back this week.

On the friend front, I've been having a great time. No fights..which is strange for me.

But I've discovered something. something rather bad. Something rather frightening...

I don't get along with my class.

HOW HORRIBLE IS THAT?! I have sixteen people in my class. These people have been here since my third grade year (well most of them have been...) and I don't get along with them! I get along with the Junior guys just fine. But not my class!

I mean, I don't hate them. I'm genuinely upset that I've apparently been neglecting my friendships with these people I count among my good friends. I get along with them fine. I love them and I doubt any of them harbor feelings of anger against me. But I've neglected them! I'm not close to them at ALL!!!

What will I do when my friends graduate in two years? They'll all be at college! Davey, Logan, Seth, Jeremy, Payne, Charles, Austin? Poof!!!

And that's the same year Abby will be going to college!!! I'll have no friends at ALL!!

I don't think I can make it that year....maybe I could graduate over the summer and go to college early. Except I'll only be seventeen. Not eighteen. That puts on damper on my plans...

I'll miss them so much. But everyone leaves eventually. It sickens me to think that these people I've spent so long getting close to will not only be going away and leaving me behind, it sickens me that they are only there for the first twenty years of my life. After that they fade into the background and this life I've built stands as nothing. Just memories that must be left behind. These best friends will no longer be best friends. They'll be memories.

I'll have to actually make friends when I leave Grove!!!

At Grove your kind of forced into making friends. Because there's only about 50 of us. So even if you don't want to be friends, you will be. You have to be. Or life is simply impossible.

Although that is not always true that we're forced to make friends. Because before two years ago the Four Peers (minus Jeremy) were kind of there own set of people. Then I popped the bubble.

Those were good times. Really good times. And in a couple years it won't matter because they'll have girlfriends and wives and I'll be unable to hang out with them because of their girlfriends. That SUCKS!!!

OK maybe I'm focusing on the negative...

NO I'M NOT!! I'M FOCUSING ON REAL LIFE SITUATIONS!!! OH MY GOSH I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITH NINE CATS AND A YELLOW KITCHEN!!!

(Don't ask...just don't ask people.)

OK. NOW I'm over reacting.

I'm good. I'm good. My rant is over now.

As you can tell, homework has taken a seriously toll on my sanity and health. Well, you can't tell the health part since you can't see the huge bags under my eyes right now. But I do believe I'm going sane.

I don't like being sane. Its no longer fun. I need someone to come make it insane again.

Wait...let me count the number of insane people in my life..............

There's to many to count. It's definitely higher than two though. I'm going to have to say the top two are Abby and Vito though. So...

AAAAABBBYYYY!!!! VIIITTTOOOOO!!! Come make my life interesting please!!!!

*Sigh* I'm just going mad now. Oh well. I'll talk to you guys later. You've seen, like, five different personalities in one blog today. I'm going to go to sleep now.....

Until the bags under my eyes go away,

Christina

For Lack of a Better Word...Ow...

Song of the Day: "Tonight Tonight" by Hot Chelle Rae
Accessory of the Day: the bags under my eyes....
Guitar Name: Cadan

Oh. My. Gosh.

The reason I haven't posted for almost a week and a half because I've had the MOST HECTIC WEEK IN THE WORLD!!!

I swear. Every single cheesy teenage drama thing that can happen to a girl...happened to me. In the course of one week. Seven days of torture. Seven days of better. My girlfriend didn't cheat on me though. (Don't understand? Listen to the song of the day, kiddos.)

Ranging from arguments with friends, to getting asked out, to asking someone else out, to rejection, to failure, to crying at school, to pouring your heart out to your crush...I mean oh my WORD!!!

I almost died from drama overload. I'm a simple girl. I really am. Or I try to be. But sometimes...it just OVERLOADS!!!

I'm usually kind of prepared for it but this totally started without warning. I'm just sitting at lunch when all of a sudden Logan lunges across my lap to snag a falling Oreo!

Poor poor Logan....

I was never actually angry at the poor soul but after four straight days of fighting and being bitter towards each other I finally got over it. It was both our faults but both of us were too stubborn to admit it...so yeah. That was that.

That also kind of happened AFTER I asked him out on a date.

Everyone pauses and stares at the last words. Ha! I laugh at your confused, shocked expressions!

I didn't REALLY ask him out on a date. I asked if he would at all consider going to banquet with me as a friend. And he didn't take that in any sort of wrong way. He rejected me of course. Which I was OK with. I figured he would do that from the beginning. Not in a "he's a jerk" sort of way. Just the "he's not interested in going to banquet with you or anyone" kind of way...

I guess you'd just have to ask him...he's  a weird guy. One of my best guy friends. But still weird.

So then through a twisted set of circumstances Davey ended up asking me really early to banquet. Which (this was during my fight with Logan) Logan found offensive for some reason...

But now THAT part is resolved. I have Logan as one of my best guy friends and Davey as my date to banquet. Now....lets make one thing very clear.

I AM NOT DATING DAVEY.

That was basically for Bethany. Who still thinks I used to date Cody Bacon...and her reasoning behind that is a picture that was taken when I was four years old....weird kid.

Now. Put all of that information in a box. Close the box.

Take a deep breath.

Now I'll start with another edge of my drama.

I was having this whole thing with my friend Seth. (No, Seth Bishop. Not you.) And...yeah...that was interesting. It all started last, last Friday. The 16th. Ever since that day we've been narrowly avoiding the one conversation I'd been dreading since camp.

"Who are you waiting for, Twix?"

Hm...that was a LONG conversation.

But yeah. From rejection to acceptance, eh?

But this week has been MUCH different. It's been great! I think...so far. It's only Wednesday. I keep hoping something amazingly awesome happens...but nothing totally coated in epic has occurred...

But there is fun to come. Retreat with my school on Friday. Saturday is the Dr. Who season finale when Davey will come over and we'll eat fish fingers and custard. (Oh yes. Be jealous.)

Well hopefully it'll pick up eventually. I get to play paintball so...maybe I'll get injured and have something really strange happen. That'd be cool...

OK not COOL but at least interesting. I need to get out of here!!! It's so BORING!!!

I get excited when I can eat breakfast really fast and play on the computer before school. I'M INCREASING WORLD SUCK!!! OH MY GOSH!!!

Well I'll talk to you soon.

Until my blog runs out of ink,

Christina

BIG SUPRISES

Song of the Day: "Sigh no more" mumford and sons
Accessory of Awesome: my sunglasses
People texted: Payne, Vito, Kevin

Hey guys! Big surprise! My name's Christina.

I think the majority of you knew this so it doesn't really make a difference anymore. If you don't know me, I went by Adeline because I'm a paranoid person and Adeline is my Rigilian name.

If you don't know what Rigilian means...well that's a good thing. So I commend you for it. I could go into details and explain it all but I really don't feel up to that. Ha ha!

I did something awesome today. I wet my pants.

...

OK, no I didn't really wet myself. I dumped a soda all over the front of my shorts. It was horrid. I was just texting during lunch and Payne was bugging me about how I wasn't allowed to drink Cherry Coke because he and Brandon had made a pact or something like that to always drink Cherry Coke and it was there drink.

You see what I go through each day? Payne whining about all the intimate things he does with Brandon... That sounded so wrong.

I love Cherry Coke! It is my favorite drink, even more than Dr. Pepper. If it was a man, I would marry it. Because it is the perfect drink. Cherry Coke is my drug.

I just realized that I sound totally addicted to Cherry Coke... maybe I am but I doubt it. I've never been addicted to anything before but I sincerely doubt that I'm addicted to Cherry Coke because: one, it has no addictive qualities in it. two, I didn't drink any most of the summer because I only buy it from the coke machine at school. three, I just...really doubt it.

I reach over to grab my sandwich while texting Vito during school (Texting is against the rules, kids. This is God's punishment for breaking the rules.) and I spill the majority of the can on my pants.

As quick as I can I shove my phone into Logan's hand, stand up, and move the rest of my stuff out of the way of the sticky liquid. But the damage has been done. The whole inner part and front of my pants legs are soaked through with Cherry Coke.

And like the sympathetic group my guy friends are...they all start laughing. Which I'm OK with, because it's pretty dang HILARIOUS!!!

It's funny because everyone at my table spills something on their pants during the year. Logan always has food on his pants. Davey spilled juice on his pants. Actually...Seth spilled juice in Davey's pants...

(There are so many things in this blog that could be taken the wrong way...I'm pretty sure I should shut up soon.)

Fifteen minutes later, I'm back in the lunch room with gym shorts that are WAY too big and you can see through them. I don't know about you, but I don't like the fact that any pervert or even a normal person can see through the back of my gym shorts. No one should see my underwear!!!

My friends have taken it upon themselves to mop up the mess...with Davey's lunch box.

(Davey, you should clean that lunch box. Seth dabbing it on the napkin doesn't make it clean.)

So I eat the remainder of my lunch and Logan gives me back my phone. The rest of lunch goes on without a problem...mostly.

So the moral of this story is, DON'T TEXT IN SCHOOL!!! BAD THINGS HAPPEN!!!

The rest of the day was great. Do any of you have embarrassing stories? You should tell me. And bring me a Cherry Coke tomorrow.

I wonder what wonderful things shall occur tomorrow to make my life more interesting.

Until my life gets boring,

Christina


PS

This spelling check device doesn't recognize the word "texting" as a word. They should fix that.

PPS

Of you want to see my youtube channel that I just created, here's a link.

http://www.youtube.com/user/byDarknessHid?feature=mhsn

Don't expect perfection. I just started learning how to edit videos. But I think their entertaining, so check them out. That's all. Bye!

Perverted Jokes and Missing You

Song of the Day: "Lucky You" Taylor Swift
Hat of the Day: Nothing...no hats for school. But I have a cool blazer!
Quote: "You don't know what Big Logan is?"

I wonder why I sit with my lunch table sometimes. As wonderful and...interesting as each of the members are they all have one thing in common that kind of sickens me.

They are all perverted, teenage boys.

Ranging from Gumsan who just turned fifteen to Josh who's nearing seventeen I think, they all make perverted jokes from time to time. I don't mind poop jokes. I don't mind disgusting jokes. I don't mind political jokes. But I do mind when they make comments about "big Logan" or anything along those lines.

But, you know, that's what I asked for when I started hanging out with guys. Their cool...like bow ties and fezzes. (That was for you, Davey.)

My school days are...basically an escape me I suppose. I get out of the house and do something productive with my time so its better than being home and...well being home in general I suppose.

(So I totally just ran into this girl I haven't seen since seventh grade here at the library. Weird right?)

But the weekends are something different. Normal kids look forward to the weekend. I don't. At all. I look forward to going back to school. Because at school I don't have time to think about other things, like people I don't see or people I miss a lot. But at home on the weekends with a limited amount of things I can do...I tend to miss people more than I do during school.

So you see what I mean when I say schools an escape. I don't love school particularly. I don't love being in class. I love my class, which consists of seven girls and four guys who are all varying degrees of insane. I love my teachers, who also vary in degrees in insanity. And I love my other friends from the rest of my school, which would fit inside one column of bleachers at Freeman's football field without any trouble.

I need to find a hobby. Writing is a hobby but instead of helping me focus on something else, it makes me even more emotional. When I write, I put my heart and soul into it. I write what I'm feeling most and that's probably why I'm writing about how I miss people so much.

By people I mean Seth Gustafson and by miss I mean completely wish I could drive because I would drive across the country and visit him if I could right NOW!

But, that's my life. I am a happy, go lucky girl by day but at night I'm basically a writer who pours out her heart and soul into her books.

Depressing right?

I try my best. Ha ha!

Well, can't really say I'll see you later. Because I won't be seeing any of you. Except for the majority of you who I'll see tomorrow at school. If your seeing me tomorrow....BRING MY DR. PEPPER!!!

Till this space bar stops making really loud noises,

Adeline

PS

seriously, bring me a Dr. Pepper.

Awkward Silence

Hanging out with all guys is not new to me. Actually the complete opposite! I find myself actually feeling slightly strange when I'm with all girls because I've become so used to hanging out with my guy friends so much. But when things like this happen, it gets a little awkward.

By the way, the names have been changed so that people don't get offended...even though they probably will anyways.

The kids I hang out with seem to have forgotten I'm a girl sometimes. I had one boy try to kick me in the balls this summer and I had to literally remind him I was not a boy. But this afternoon, after the chant of "sosten bra! sosten bra!" during lunch, I had study hall with Mrs. C.

I love Mrs. C. She may be my favorite teacher. But she has a tendency to meddle in the affairs of teenage romances. This has nothing to do with the fact I have a relationship. I don't. Which is a good thing because boys are gross...plus I already got my heart busted. So I'm not in the mood to do it again anytime soon.

But we were sitting there, and Adam and Mrs. C were going back and forth about siblings. Adam little sister is probably the cutest girl in school. She's a beautiful girl with blond hair and pretty eyes. She's insane, sure, but she's really pretty. So they were talking about that and Mrs. C. makes the comment, "Well, you'll have to look out when boys start going after her."

Adam kind of shrugs and Mrs. C. talks about how she always wanted an older brother to rough up the boys who came around. And of course, I exclaim:

"No you don't!"

Well I don't technically have an older brother. But my "big brother" would be my life long friend, Charles. He's this big Filipino guy who weighs in about 250lbs. I've known him my whole life. He makes a point to rough up/meet every single one of my boyfriends and/or friend boys.

So I explained this to Mrs. C. and of course it can't stay simple like that. Adam looks over at me.

"You mean that big Filipino kid? You didn't tell him about me did you?"

And I just sit there for a second. Because Adam's never talked about us being friends in public before. We don't even have a thing if that's what your thinking. We are just friends and that's all. But the whole group of guys behind us kind of turns around and stares. Because Adam and I don't talk about our friendship really. Adam's weird like that. He thinks it'll reflect badly on him or something. (No offense, Adam.)

"I did." I admit, laughing.

The whole time Mrs. C. is staring at us, glancing from Adam to me, me to Adam, and Adam to me. So forth and so on.

"This is because your friends or because you just talk about him?" Mrs. C. asks, looking at Adam.

"She just talks about me." he says. Which annoys me, and I glare at him before going back to writing.

"No, it's cause we're friends." I respond, kind of irritated.

Then this awkward silence falls across the classroom and Mrs. C. is smiling at me, eyes wide in this kind of nervous expression. And out of the corner of my eye I see Lewis pound Adam on the back and say something along the lines of, "Way to go, man. Score."

And being the completely oblivious kind of guy he is Adam responds, "What do you mean?"

Mrs. C. and I exchange a glance and I look back at my work.

So, its only really during these sort of times that I begin to get that awkward feeling around guys that makes me want to crawl into a hole and hide for a few centuries. Like when they chant the Spanish word for bra loudly in the cafeteria, or talk about girls, or realize I'm a girl a second to late, or when awkward, half accusations are made towards me and one of the guys I hang out with. Unfortunately it's usually Adam and I who get those weird accusations. And usually its from Mrs. C. She seems to think we'd make a good couple. And she's told me as much. In front of my whole class.

So that doesn't help my nonpublic friendship much. Ha ha!

Until the clouds turn purple,

Adeline

First Impressions Aren't My Strong Suit...

Song of the Day: "Headphones" Britt Nicole
Hat worn: None :( No hats at school
Book most recently finished: Paper Towns by John Green (not as good as expected...if you don't like cussing don't read it.)

First day of my sophomore year in high school. Complete. It was probably the coolest day of school I've ever had. I'm really excited for this year. We've got a ton of new students with a lot of potential and a few new teachers who seem very nice. My schedule is great and my friends are still there. My guy friends are hilarious and (unfortunately) perverted as usual. Strangely, I wouldn't have it any other way.

I have to leave for church soon so I'll just give you highlights of my AMAZING day at school.

• my home room teacher, who's been wanting this since I met her, is now pregnant with her first baby.
• I made a horrible first impression of myself in front of some of the new students in my class. Actually just one. She must think I'm crazy.
• I brought in my borrowed Sonic Screwdriver and people thought I was trying to taze them.
• Lunch was hilarious. First spill mopped up with Davey's lunch box. First spill on Davey's pants...in your pants...or that's what she said at least.
• Another highlight is that I just fit in two perverted/retarded jokes in the highlight above me.
• I probably scared Austin (a new kid) by being the only girl at my lunch table and a total history buff in my Military History class.
• My math teacher actually seems REALLY nice. (Weird right?)

Well, the family summons me. Have a great school year guys! Talk to you soon.

Till I stop reading,

Adeline

Creepy Baby Dolls

My friends from Canada, mainly John and Reice, always tell me that there is never a dull moment with me. Well, the truth is, I try not to let there be. Life is short! We all know that. So why waste it and let there be all these grey, dull, boring moments in between all the excellent, brilliant, wonderful times? It seems sort of pointless.

Contrary to popular belief, I do have dull and boring moments. Today was not one of those moments.

I bought one of my "big sisters" a birthday present. She seems to have a fear of dolls, which I now understand. But before I began to understand this fear, I bought her a doll necklace. The chain has the creepiest looking doll on the end. I wrapped it up and wrote in big letters "FACE YOUR FEAR!"

Of course, I now realize how creepy baby dolls are from a recent episode of Doctor Who, my all time favorite TV show. But the villains in this show were, of course, baby dolls of mass destruction!!!

It was terrifying. It truly was. That's why I'm up late writing about it and waiting for my friend to watch it so I can gripe more about how scary it was!

So, after all that, I just want to say that I'm sorry for getting Nikki that scary necklace. Even though I haven't given it to her yet.

She is my last "big sister" left at home. The rest have gone off the college or gotten married or pregnant and married. So I'm sort of big sister-less. It's sad, really.

I suppose it doesn't really make sense why I'm saying "big sister" and not just big sister. Its because they aren't really my big sisters. I'm the oldest in my family. But I've known them so long and they act like it so much...I just kind of call them my "big sisters". I have five.

Glad we got that cleared up. If it needed clearing up... alonzey!

Is that how you spell it? Alonzi? Alonzey? Alonzo? No that last ones a name. What I'm trying to say is "lets go" in French slang. I'm not doing so well.

I've got to get to bed now. Tomorrow is church and me and Abby are going to make a very, very educational video on proper ways to wear your scarf. Knowing me, you know that it'll be hilarious. I'm sure now that whenever my youth group goes out in public, it's for other peoples amusement because we act so stupid. Ha ha!

Until baby dolls aren 't creepy anymore,

Adeline Taylor

The End of it All

Song of the day: "I wouldn't mind" he is we
Hat worn: Yankees cap
Facebook status: ""I know your scared. But don't run. Don't ever run when your scared.""

I've got to say...at the beginning of this summer I wasn't expecting so much. In all honesty, I was kind of...sad that summer was beginning. I wouldn't see my friends from school as often. I knew my friends would be heading to college. I would have math tutoring too much and I barely had enough time for myself as it was with three trips planned. I wasn't expecting it to be so...huge.



Nathan with me at the
X-men First Class movie



I wasn't expecting it to be so wonderful. I wasn't expecting it to be so painful. I wasn't expecting it to be anything out of the ordinary. But it was all of those things. It was probably the most brilliant summer in existence.

 I will say this was the best summer until another summer comes along and beats it. But I doubt that will happen anytime soon. Although it may and I'll have to take this whole paragraph back. But I doubt camp will be better because the epicsause has left leaving it more empty.

Davey and Nathan (and Payne)
at Kings Dominion



For the first few weeks of my summer, at least until camp, I just got together with a lot of my friends and got to hang out. We went to Kings Dominion, an amusement park near my house. We went to the mall. We went to the movies. We went everywhere and acted like goofy teenagers, which I think is the best part about being a teenager. You can act like a goofy teenager, because no one expects differently from you! (Which is both wonderful and aggravating at the same time. Because they don't expect anything. At all. So its a pro and a con.)

I spent a lot of time this summer hanging out with Davey, who is in this picture to the left of these words. (Ooo complicated picture do-hicky-thingy-ma-bobs) He is the only guy who can drive me around which is pretty awesome because before I wasn't aloud to be alone in the car with a boy. Which was OK, if annoying. I understood the rule and stuff but now I can ride with Davey so it's easier to get a ride. I do get my licence in May though so that'll be helpful.



Kai and me



After these few weeks, I headed off to camp. Which I've talked about before. But I still get so worked up about it because it was just so...cool! I mean I had so much fun its insane. Ha! I miss Word of Life so much. I miss the people more. I fell in love. I fell apart. So actually, this was kind of part of "the painful part" of my summer. But it was also awesome!



I mean everyone needs a camp romance. And everyone needs to know they don't last. So my once in a lifetime camp romance has come and gone. It was good, but I'm kind of glad its over. Too much drama. Like I need more of that in my life. Ha ha! Maybe next summer. ;)



(Side note: I had this whole blog finished and it was VERY long and I pushed the publish button...and it somehow broke and messed up and deleted everything after this point. To put it lightly, I am slightly angry. OK actually, I'm infuriated! It was really good too... so I'll try to recreate it as best I can. But right now I'm emotionally spent from writing so much. So it'll probably come across really dry.)



The team from teens who worked with
our group during VBS and at the concert

 About two weeks after camp it was off to Canada. Prince Edward Island more specifically. I had so much fun there. It was interesting...I spent almost two weeks with the same nine people. I'm closer to each of them in very strange ways. Ha ha! That long in a house with thirteen people and one bathroom. Interesting.

I met so many people there too that I'll be friends with for eternity. Literally. We'll all meet up again in heaven and hang out, praising Jesus. It'll be awesome! Sherlyn and [censored name of Hungarian spy] were so kind to put up with us for that long. We were loud, obnoxious, annoying, and we almost broke a lot of their stuff...that last one was mostly me. I got injured a lot. A lot, a lot!

I learned on that trip that I shouldn't complain too. I complained so much on that trip and I am ashamed of how I acted. I acted like a baby. I have no excuse either. I hope in the future I can be better and not complain, because if it annoyed me, it must've annoyed everyone else a lot more! Ha ha. I hope they still love me.

Bethany, Melissa, Bethannie, and Me
at Burger King on the way back
from Smith Mountain Lake sporting amazing
hats

After PEI (prince edward island) I left on a trip to Smith Mountain Lake in northern Virginia. We spent a week in a lake house with my family and three friends. Bethannie, Bethany, and Timothy. It was a fun week, but it was slightly overshadowed by the fact I was wondering the whole time if my mom had cancer.

Yup...that would be a downer. Ha ha...ha...ahem.

She doesn't have cancer by the way. She's fine.

But we did have fun laughing, dancing, singing, watching TV, swimming, tanning, and boating. I did learn a great deal about dealing with naive people and about how to talk to girls. Apparently I'm not that good at it. Even though I am one. Ha ha!

After that I spent the rest of the summer up to this point hanging out at home, sleeping, reading, trying to write, shopping for school, and eating. It's been much less exciting.

But I've had the coolest summer ever. I think I'll always look back on this summer and think it was the best. But it wouldn't have been without a few people who were always there when I needed them. They MADE this summer for me.

Vito, Davey, Logan, Abby, Laura, and Melissa.


I'll never forget you guys. I can't. Literally. I'll see most of you in  few days. But thank you so much for making this the best summer for me. It's been amazing. Let's make the next one even better, k? I'm already looking forward it. Ha ha!

Till my drivers ed teacher stops singing,

Adeline Taylor







Just Believe



Goodness I don't know what's been going on. Well I do, but it's been a pretty confusing few weeks. I wish I could figure it out and make a map out in my brain so everything lines up. But my brain never really worked that way.

I fight to control some aspect of my life. Just so I know I can handle something in my life. I know that's unbiblical. I know that God is supposed to control every part of our lives. But life has been so hectic and I long for just one piece of solid ground to stand on. I feel like I'm teetering on the edge of a cliff and I can't see any way to stop the fall.

Because no one seems to be here to grab me and pull me back.

My mom may have cancer. She's at a doctors appointment right now where they are going to examine the three tumors and see if their cancerous. The doctors are also going to tell us what they want to do with it. When they want to get them out and stuff. So operations. Yay.

I've learned a lot these past few weeks. I've learned a little about how the world works, how people act, how God works, and a lot about myself.

See, God works in mysterious ways. We all know that, obviously, or we'd be able to figure out what was going on real quickly. I could look at my mom's health and say, "Oh look! Those three tumors are going be show me a thing or two about how the world works and change our lives forever. God is going to use it in >insert some amazing area of life< and allow us to >insert amazing thing< through all the crap! I understand now!"

Unfortunately, God works in mysterious ways. Ha.

But I've survived thus far. I know something will happen. I don't know what. But it'll work out. God works like that.

I mean, I'm not saying I'll understand what happens. But it'll happen and I'm a good soldier. I can take it. I can endure. I hope...

I think I'm writing this to reassure myself and it's not working. Ha ha. I'm hilarious.

Pray for my mom though please. Everything helps. She gets back from her tests later this afternoon. So I'm here, unusually peaceful actually. God sure is amazing.

I'll check back in with an update later.


PS

Wow it seems like I started out whining and by the end it all changed to something else. That's really strange but, weirdly enough, happens whenever I write out my problems. I start out really sad and dreary and then get actually sort of happy towards the end. I'm an optimist. What can I say?

Life in Boredom

As you may have noticed, my three or four readers, that I have neglected to post since my return from Canada. There is a very good excuse for this. Well, actually I have several. You can choose one.

1. I have had no time
2. Monkeys stole my computer
3. I've been working on something completely awesome and the list of my necessities has placed my blog somewhere at the bottom

Well it's none of the above. To put it simply, nothing happens to me. I miss my friends. I miss nice temperatures that are anywhere below 90. I miss spending my afternoons hanging out with my friends. I even miss living in a house with thirteen people and one bathroom. That is how bored I am.

Some how, life at home isn't satisfying. I have this longing to wander that isn't satisfied unless I'm somewhere else entirely. I don't feel it when I'm at church with my youth group (my youth group being the people I've known my entire life and consider most of them almost as close to me as my family.)

But I'm not always with my youth group. I'm not always with my friends. I'm usually home.

Why do flights have to be so expensive?

I've been trying to plan a trip out to Michigan so I can visit my friend on his birthday. He's turning nineteen. He's making an effort to come to my sixteenth birthday party in December, and I hope he does come. I believe he'll try his best.

But even with the $200 gift certificate I'm getting for Delta because of the mishap with the whole Prince Edward Island to Toronto to Atlanta to Virginia thing I'd need to raise $288.60 cents, plus tax! I miss him so much. He's one of my best guy friends and I really just want to see him for a day or two.

But its hard to come by nearly $300. It's even harder to come by my parents approval in the matter. The idea of my crossing state lines to visit a guy doesn't appeal to them. To be honest, the gossip that will occur doesn't appeal to me much either. The people I respect and care about will understand. The rest of the people? Well I'll be known as a horrible person.

Gah. Life. Responsibilities. Growing up. None of it appeals to me. At all. I sound really juvenile, but maybe that's how I feel. Maybe I am juvenile. I'm only fifteen, I can be juvenile if I want to. Curses!!!

Yeah...that was my rant for the day. Sorry for dragging you into it. Hope it's enlightened you to...life.

As always: honor the King. I'll see you soon. Not literally. But...you get my point.

Until the crayons melt,

Adeline Taylor

Oh Canada...

Hey. I have returned from my missions trip. We returned safe, if a little tired and smelly. You know, after living eleven days in a house with thirteen people and one bathroom, people may expect me to be happy.

But I'm not. Which is...weird.

I miss living in the house with my friends and my youth leaders. I missed my family of course. I love my family. But I wish I was still traveling. I guess you could call it a wander lust. I want to travel a lot. Maybe it's a teenager thing.

But the missions trip was a great success. We helped out at Grace Baptist Church where we helped them with their VBS.

You may be wondering what VBS is. Vegetable Bacon Sandwich? Vulcan Birch System? It's actually Vacation Bible School. It's a great thing where a bunch of little kids get together in one building and we have to take care of them and teach them about Jesus.

I've decided I want to move to Prince Edward Island. It's beautiful and no body locks their doors.

Wow...that sounded really sketchy. Let me rephrase that.

It's beautiful and there is no crime there, thus meaning no one locks their doors.

If you haven't heard of Prince Edward Island, its a province of Canada right above Maine. If you haven't heard of Maine, it's a northern state of the USA. If you haven't heard of the USA...well then you have a problem.

I met so many new and amazing people. John, Reice, McKenzie, Brittany, Jeremy, Jess, Tibor, and Sherlyn were amazing people. I miss them a lot. That's the only sad part about traveling. You have to leave people behind when you leave home and you have to leave people behind when you leave your destination.

But then you have these great things called memories and life is just more awesome with them.

If you haven't noticed, I started another blog. It's an ongoing story. You should look at it because it's going to be sweet.

I hope you all are safe and sound. Have a great next few weeks of summer. I know I will be.

Honor all people. Fear God. Love the Brotherhood. Honor the King.

Until you all know what yupers are,

Adeline Taylor

PS

By the way, if you ever do want to figure out what yupers are and you want to watch a wierd kid make a fool of himself check out this link.

Vito Basura Vladimere   For the record, this guy is one of my friends from camp. He also mentions me near the end under my nick name. (Being Twix the Monkey is hard.)

The pink cow boy hat he wears? Yeah...that is really a long and epic story. It's the reason I met him the summer of my fifth grade year. It's been so long. Haha.

Return of the Fedora

If you recall from several posts ago, I vowed to wear my fedora at camp. A fedora, if you don't know, is a hat. It's sort of like a cow boy hat, only think more mafia/mob sort of thing. If I can figure out how to use this thing (pokes computer screen) then I'll post a picture of the infamous hat.

Unfortunately, through a strange set of circumstances involving ding dong ditching, frozen muffins, and porn watching Indian boys, I lost my fedora on my trip to camp. It never got to be seen by my crazy friends. It was a very depressing time for me. I started crying. If it was from lack of sleep, the sentimental value of the hat, or the fact I'm a female and I was PMSing we will never know, but I was crying none the less.

My "older brother" had given me the cranial covering a few years before hand before he left for college in North Carolina. He wasn't really my big brother. But I'd known him since before I could remember and as far as I knew, he'd always been there for me. I love my fake big brother. So I treasured that hat like a dragon hoarded his treasure.

But there I was at camp. Hatless.

Of course I did have my New York Yankee's cap...but it didn't have the effect I was going for.

But, out of the blue, I get a phone call around 11:30pm yesterday afternoon.

Me: Hello?

Charles: Squish!

Me: Ha ha! Hey Charles.

Charles: Hey. So...what are you doing today?

Me: Nothing. Just packing.

Charles: Oh really. Packing?

Me: Yeah...

Charles: I have a question for you.

Me: What's that?

*Door bell rings*

It was one of the best surprises anyone could have given me. I ran the rest of the way down the stairs and opened the door. Charles was standing there, grinning. I attacked him. Literally. If he wasn't basically two of me put together, I would've knocked him over.

But he surprised me by showing up at my house (this was all planned with my mother completely last minute) and taking me out to lunch. It was amazing. But on my way out to his car, I spotted a box in the front seat.

It was wrapped in newspaper. (College kids...so poor.) And what do you think was inside?

A new fedora.

So yes. A new fedora has entered my life. It is just like the last one only a bit bigger and more sturdy. I am looking forward to all the adventures I shall have wearing it.

I'll be traveling out of the country tomorrow. I'm excited about going with my youth group on our very first international missions trip. I shan't tell you where we are going, but you shall hear about it when I return. As much as I wish I could update my blog from there I do not think it will be possible.

So, come the 30th of July, I shall return and fill you in on all the juicy details. Until then though, stay safe. Stay strong. Stay with God. I will miss you all.

Until monkeys aren't cool anymore,

Adeline Taylor

PS

Lexander, when I return, we should get together and play Monster Hunter. I don't own it yet, but I'd love to just hang out and watch if I can. See you soon.

So this is me in my fedora. I did get my computer to work. I'm so proud of myself. Bwahaha.

Job: Therapist

I've noticed lately that God gives everyone a job to do. It may seem small, but it can have an impact. I always thought that I never made a difference and I had nothing I could offer to God. Well...I don't know if I'm making a difference but I am doing something.

I'm a therapist. Duh.

Don't get me wrong, I love helping people. But the fact that they come to me in the first place frightens me. Why do they come to me? I am an ignorant, naive kid who goes to a Christian school and doesn't know the first thing about being street smart. I live in a good Christian home with two parents, minimum fighting, and enough money to satisfy every ones needs. I go to church whenever the doors are open!

But people come to me for advice...

I was talking to God last night about it and was basically venting. This is how the conversation went:

Me: God, I don't know why these people come to me! What do I have to offer to them?

God: My son. My love.

Me: ...grrrr...

God: ^_^

Yes. That is EXACTLY how the conversation went. Although I don't know if it involved God making that face in the end. Although I'm pretty sure it was something like that.

It was so obvious! How could I not realize that? I don't need to say something smart and therapist-ish. I just had to tell them about God and love them like God would. If they asked for my advice, then I would help them. I would give them the best answers I could, but point them in the right direction.

GOD. (duh...)

Sometimes I'm pretty thick headed. If you haven't noticed.

Till the ocean runs out of waves,

Adeline Taylor

PS:

If you're getting tired of all the serious stuff, I promise to post about something really cool. Like what I've been doing for the past (what is it now?) three weeks. Soon I'll be leaving for Prince Edward Island, Canada. So I promise it try to post before I leave because I'm not sure if I'll be able to gain access to a computer while we're there.

Epiphany

For the past several weeks...probably months...I've been struggling with finding ambition to seek God. I knew that I should want God, and seek Him with everything I have. But I wasn't feeling it. At all. That frustrated me so much I spent many nights hoping and praying for that feeling you have when you follow God. That closeness and adoration of His awesome power. But I did not have it.

And last night, I had an epiphany. I don't really know what made it happen. I was sitting on my bed, waiting for my friend Kai to text me after he got out of show choir camp. It hit me that I was more excited about getting a text then about opening God's word. And my life shouldn't be like that.

I learned at camp that my life should be devoted to God. My every breath comes because God allows me to breathe. It is not fair for me to spend all day excited about a boy texting me but then put off my quiet time because I did not feel like doing it.

Every girl or boy or even adults can struggle with this. I struggle with this so often and I know I can't be the only one. I may love to talk to Kai or Davey or Logan or Ellie or Abby or my mom. But I can't love talking to them more then I love talking to God. God saved my life! He allows me to go to heaven and not to hell. He is the reason I'm alive.

And as I sat there on my bed, shocked at how utterly selfish I was, I texted my friend for help. Elizabeth, my counselor from camp. I texted her this message: "I want to make God the focus of me life. I want to. So badly. But I can't and I don't know how to fix it. Can you help me in anyway?"

I kid you not, the second I sent the text it was life a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I realized something. God just wants me to try! I wasn't trying before! I may have thought I was trying, but I wasn't. The reason my heart wasn't in it was because...it wasn't! I hadn't taken that first step and asked for help. I had begged God for a closeness that I really didn't want. I just knew I needed it. So I asked for it.

But then, after I asked for help from Elizabeth, I knew that I wanted it more than anything. Because feeling far away from God isn't something I wanted to feel. God is so much more important than boys, friends, reading, work, food, sleep, or anything you can come up with! I had been unwilling to take that first step until I realized that I was so attached to things of this world.

So I'm planning on turning over a new leaf if I can. I'm trying to read through the entire New Testament at the moment. It's not even close to the size of a Harry Potter book and I was going to try to re-read the last book before Friday morning. So why not read the Bible? Because we think its boring? Its not!

So...that's what I'm trying to do. I'll post updates hopefully.

Thank you for reading. If you did. I hope that this can help you like it helped me. Just remember. Stay strong. Stay safe. Stay with God. :)

Until Canadians stop saying "eh",

Adeline Taylor

Christ walks on this Island, will you meet Him here?

Well, I promised that I would re post my list and say how it went. I'm just saying, Word of Life Island is the best place on earth. I met and was reunited with so many interesting and wonderful people this year. It was probably my best year I've had.

Although, I did not complete every thing on the list as I promised I would.

1. I did see Vito. In fact, I saw A LOT of Vito because I hung out with him most of the week and became very good friends with him. I've known him since I was ten or eleven by the way. I miss him about as much as I miss Kai. Which is a lot.
2. I saw Nicole only twice, but she was as great as ever. I miss my big sister.
3. I saw Taylor every day. She worked for the Medication Station so she was at every meal. Thank goodness I never actually had to go to the infirmary for a real injury.
4. I saw Shannon every day because she was my counselor!!! :D
5. I saw Elizabeth everyday because she was my counselor as well. :)
6. I saw Joseph only twice. Because he was working across the lake on the children's camp.
7. I did make a lot of friends. (And also several enemies because of the friends I made.) Lake, Victoria, Adrienne, Vito, Kai, Devin, Hunter, Jables, Jon, Ginger, Heather, Amber, Green Lantern, Will, Adam, Blaise, Steve, etc. etc.
8. Our cabin gave up on trying to win cabin of the week on account that it took too much energy and time to impress the program guys. Plus, who wants to cheer their heads off every meal just to win a stupid party barge? I'd rather have fun during the week.
9. I got 3rd place in my web site. I also got 5th place in poetry. I did not place in my short story though.
10. I became well known as Twix the Monkey, Fez Girl, Nerd Glasses Girl, and the girl who followed Vito and Kai. What can I say? I'm pretty awesome.
11. I spent everything but two quarters and the lucky penny our youth leader gave me.
12. I FAILED!!! I did not do a meal time challenge. At all. Lucky me.
13. Adam, Blaise, Chung Day, and Steve
14. I helped uproot a tree. Does that count as as encouraging my sense of daring?
15. I ate almost everything. It was GOOD. 
16. I did. Once. Because then we found out we weren't allowed to chill there. 
17. Um...epic fail. But I'm sort of glad I failed at this one. I liked two guys. One of them is now basically my coolest friends and one of them is basically tearing my heart in half because he lives in Indiana. But they are both coming to my sixteenth birthday party in January. So I'm excited. And against popular belief, and my own belief, they WILL show up.
18. I am NOT a Vito and Kai groupie. I am their friend. All you stalkers freak me out and tried to kill me!!! I did not stalk anyone.
19. Gave my ticket for paint ball away to someone so I could hang out with Vito and Kai. 
20. I hung out with the guys from my church everyday and became friends with the guys in their cabin.
21. AVOIDED EVERY SPORTS TOURNAMENT!!! Although I did watch a few.
22. I did dress out every day. Jungle day, nerd day, tacky day, and dress your counselor day 
23. FAILED!!! I did not write everything down... 
24. I did go tubing and it was AWESOME
25. I thought I was going to die in the motel. It was so scary.  
26. I did not die. Thank God. I thought I would sometime.
27. FAIL. I did not get inspiration for my book. 
28. I did learn a lot about God. I learned that God's love for me never changes. Nothing I do can change how much he loves me. I know that he never changes. I know that his plan for my life is perfect. I know that I need to stay in his hands and never try to leave. His plan is perfect and I just need to follow it. Follow his laws no matter how much it hurts. 
29. I listened in Bible Hour everyday. Although I did almost fall asleep a few times.
30. I did have fun doing everything. Even when I was crying. Even when I was leaving. I had an AWESOME TIME!!!
31. Her name is Angie and she scares me even though I know her.
32. FAIL! I did not prank call anyone. 
33. Not only did I sing veggie tales songs with Abby at the top of my lungs I also sang many songs from musicals, the Creep, and several other hit songs.
34. I didn't need to stage the light saber battle. It happened. And I totally won!!! 
35. I participated in the Vito magic show...so yes. I did.
36. With Vito, Kai, and Abby? Of course I did something crazy everyday!!! 
37. My cabin did prank someone. We hung Sophie's Cabin's Justin Beiber cut out from the ceiling. In a noose. It was awesome. 
38. We bribed the people almost everyday and we got really good scores on our cabin.  
39. I lost my fedora. And cried. Hard. It was really sad.
40. I didn't hang out in the Pub. I stayed outside even when it was pouring. I hung out in there once because Kai and I were hiding from Kai's stalker. 
41. Easiest thing to do on the list. ;)

So, obviously camp was awesome. I miss everyone so much. It hurts more than normal, which is weird. I had an awesome time.

My month is so busy. On Friday I leave for Pennsylvania. I get two days to recuperate. Life is AWESOME.

Until the sidewalk ends,

Adeline Taylor

Don't Say Goodbye

There's a way of saying goodbye
Without saying it at all
You just run
You hide from those you love
So you don't have to say goodbye
You stay far away
No matter how much it hurts
No matter how hard you cry
You just run because your scared
Scared of loosing them
Scared of never seeing them
Scared you said too much
Scared you never said enough
Cause life just won't be the same
But life shouldn't ever be
Life moves on and on
And its a vapor
So make use of the time you have
Cause you'll never get time back
You just can't
Cause life just goes like that

To Vito, Kai, Jon, Ginger, Lake, Adrienne, Victoria, Hunter, Devin, Candace, Nicole, Shannon, Elizabeth, and any other people I met at camp who I haven't mentioned.

So I am off of camp property now. I am still in New York visiting my cousins though. I really wish I was home but my cousins are pretty fun to hang out with. Its going to be a good few days. I'm still missing everyone. A lot. But its better now that I've gotten  a decent ammount of asleep.

I'll post a follow up to my previous post later, so that I can check  off the checklist and tell you all how it went. Let me just say, it was awesome. I can't wait till next summer.

Until Ihop doesn't taste good anymore,

Adeline Taylor

Things One Must Accomplish At Camp

I was sitting in my room, completely and UTTERLY bored when I decided to make a list of things I had to do at camp in the coming week. I probably should be packing for the almost ten day excursion but I'm making lists instead. How typical of me.

1. See Vito
2. See Nicole
3. See Taylor
4. See Shannon
5. See Elizabeth
6. See Joseph
7. Make a lot of new friends
8. Try to win CABIN OF THE WEEK (which shall win our cabin a party on a boat on the last night. with ice cream. We've never won but I'm hoping to this year.)
9. At least place in competition (the reason we go to this camp is because my church goes each year to compete in the competitions that take place there. I have a poetry entry, a short story entry, a web site entry, and I'm hoping to place in one of them.)
10. Become well known as the crazy kid with the hats (My friend and I have a reputation to maintain.)
11. Don't spend all my money
12. Do a meal time challenge (they range from impersonating batman to making an all air instrument band (meaning air guitar, air piano, air tuba...) to eating a whole can of mayo. Once I had to suck jello out from under nacho cheese and spit it into another bowl...lets just say I can't touch either food anymore without getting sick.)
13. Memorize the program guys names (the guys who run meal time challenges. they're usually attractive as well.)
14. Encourage my sense of daring (as the Dove Chocolate wrapper told me too...)
15. Eat food from the Snack Shack. (Which shan't be hard)
16. Chill at the cliff face. (beautiful.)
17. Avoid camp romances again. (I have enough I'm trying to deal with at home. I don't need more of that drama.)
18. Do not stalk anyone. (You...probably don't want to know.)
19. Play paintball (Oh yessss...)
20. Hang out with the guys from my church and their cabin
21. Avoid sport tournaments
22. Dress out everyday (We have special days. Like grandma day, what you want to be when you grow up day, and my personal favorite...NERD DAY)
23. Document everything (already working on that)
24. Go tubing
25. Do something epic in the motel on the way up (this camp is in New York and it takes us two days to get there. This year, we are stopping at a motel. The last time we did that the girls room got stalked by a man. Not a man from our group by the way. A stranger. I'm sort of scared.)
26. Don't die.
27. Get inspiration for my book. (Pleeeease. God, pleeeease.)
28. Learn about God and grow closer to Him through the knowledge I'll hopefully gain.
29. Listen in Bible Hour
30. Have fun during EVERYTHING
31. Talk to the mean, blond girl. (she's known me since my first year there. We've never spoken, but there is an unsaid anger between us. She glares at me every time she sees me. I have no idea why. I intend to find out.)
32. Prank call on the pay phone. (I plan to prank call my guy friends. Lexander, if your reading this...um...ha ha...prepare yourself.)
33. Sing Veggie Tales songs the loudest I can with my best friend
34. Stage an epic light saber battle. (Yes. You heard me correctly.)
35. Volunteer for the magic show again.
36. Do something crazy and insane everyday.
37. Prank someone...not including the phone call.
38. Bribe Bless the people who judge the cleanliness of our cabin with food.
39. Wear my fedora every day.
40. Hand out at the Pub whenever it's open. (Its not really a Pub. We just call it that. Its the coffee shop.)
41. Make every day more awesome. (Basically...D.F.T.B.A.)

So that's what I plan to do. No you see why I am so excited. I'll be leaving in two days. Stay Safe. Stay Strong. Stay with Jesus.

Till Spider-man looses his spider sense...oh wait,

Adeline

P.S.

By the way, quite recently Spider-man did loose his spider sense. Just so everyone understands that. But don't worry. I do intend to write again.

Greetings!

Reader, if you've somehow managed to find yourself here inside this blog, then you'll have the most agonizing torment known to mankind befall you. You'll meet me.

Hi! I'm Adeline Taylor. I'm old enough to drive but young enough to still run around like a crazy person and just have people roll their eyes at me. That's right. I'm a teenager. I'm not your average teenage girl though. You'd probably expect me to start talking about chick flicks and clothes right about now...but that's hopefully never going to happen.

I'd rather read then go shopping.

I'd rather write then talk to my friends.

I'd rather go to a comic book store then hang out.

I'd rather climb trees then talk.

I'd rather hang out with a table full of crazy guys then listen to a bunch of girls whine about drama. (I have enough drama by myself, I don't need to discuss it with hormonal, irritated girls who probably just want to talk about boys anyway.)

So this is where I come to rant, write, and talk. RWT. Sounds kind of catchy actually. I guess you'll hear more from me later. I'm going to try to update every week on Wednesday. I hope you enjoy reading and I'll speak to you all in a weeks. I'll be spending a week in New York. Come Friday I'll be gone. So in almost two weeks I shall report what has occurred. Stay safe. Serve God.

Don't forget to be awesome,

Adeline Taylor