Return of the Fedora

If you recall from several posts ago, I vowed to wear my fedora at camp. A fedora, if you don't know, is a hat. It's sort of like a cow boy hat, only think more mafia/mob sort of thing. If I can figure out how to use this thing (pokes computer screen) then I'll post a picture of the infamous hat.

Unfortunately, through a strange set of circumstances involving ding dong ditching, frozen muffins, and porn watching Indian boys, I lost my fedora on my trip to camp. It never got to be seen by my crazy friends. It was a very depressing time for me. I started crying. If it was from lack of sleep, the sentimental value of the hat, or the fact I'm a female and I was PMSing we will never know, but I was crying none the less.

My "older brother" had given me the cranial covering a few years before hand before he left for college in North Carolina. He wasn't really my big brother. But I'd known him since before I could remember and as far as I knew, he'd always been there for me. I love my fake big brother. So I treasured that hat like a dragon hoarded his treasure.

But there I was at camp. Hatless.

Of course I did have my New York Yankee's cap...but it didn't have the effect I was going for.

But, out of the blue, I get a phone call around 11:30pm yesterday afternoon.

Me: Hello?

Charles: Squish!

Me: Ha ha! Hey Charles.

Charles: Hey. So...what are you doing today?

Me: Nothing. Just packing.

Charles: Oh really. Packing?

Me: Yeah...

Charles: I have a question for you.

Me: What's that?

*Door bell rings*

It was one of the best surprises anyone could have given me. I ran the rest of the way down the stairs and opened the door. Charles was standing there, grinning. I attacked him. Literally. If he wasn't basically two of me put together, I would've knocked him over.

But he surprised me by showing up at my house (this was all planned with my mother completely last minute) and taking me out to lunch. It was amazing. But on my way out to his car, I spotted a box in the front seat.

It was wrapped in newspaper. (College kids...so poor.) And what do you think was inside?

A new fedora.

So yes. A new fedora has entered my life. It is just like the last one only a bit bigger and more sturdy. I am looking forward to all the adventures I shall have wearing it.

I'll be traveling out of the country tomorrow. I'm excited about going with my youth group on our very first international missions trip. I shan't tell you where we are going, but you shall hear about it when I return. As much as I wish I could update my blog from there I do not think it will be possible.

So, come the 30th of July, I shall return and fill you in on all the juicy details. Until then though, stay safe. Stay strong. Stay with God. I will miss you all.

Until monkeys aren't cool anymore,

Adeline Taylor

PS

Lexander, when I return, we should get together and play Monster Hunter. I don't own it yet, but I'd love to just hang out and watch if I can. See you soon.

So this is me in my fedora. I did get my computer to work. I'm so proud of myself. Bwahaha.

Job: Therapist

I've noticed lately that God gives everyone a job to do. It may seem small, but it can have an impact. I always thought that I never made a difference and I had nothing I could offer to God. Well...I don't know if I'm making a difference but I am doing something.

I'm a therapist. Duh.

Don't get me wrong, I love helping people. But the fact that they come to me in the first place frightens me. Why do they come to me? I am an ignorant, naive kid who goes to a Christian school and doesn't know the first thing about being street smart. I live in a good Christian home with two parents, minimum fighting, and enough money to satisfy every ones needs. I go to church whenever the doors are open!

But people come to me for advice...

I was talking to God last night about it and was basically venting. This is how the conversation went:

Me: God, I don't know why these people come to me! What do I have to offer to them?

God: My son. My love.

Me: ...grrrr...

God: ^_^

Yes. That is EXACTLY how the conversation went. Although I don't know if it involved God making that face in the end. Although I'm pretty sure it was something like that.

It was so obvious! How could I not realize that? I don't need to say something smart and therapist-ish. I just had to tell them about God and love them like God would. If they asked for my advice, then I would help them. I would give them the best answers I could, but point them in the right direction.

GOD. (duh...)

Sometimes I'm pretty thick headed. If you haven't noticed.

Till the ocean runs out of waves,

Adeline Taylor

PS:

If you're getting tired of all the serious stuff, I promise to post about something really cool. Like what I've been doing for the past (what is it now?) three weeks. Soon I'll be leaving for Prince Edward Island, Canada. So I promise it try to post before I leave because I'm not sure if I'll be able to gain access to a computer while we're there.

Epiphany

For the past several weeks...probably months...I've been struggling with finding ambition to seek God. I knew that I should want God, and seek Him with everything I have. But I wasn't feeling it. At all. That frustrated me so much I spent many nights hoping and praying for that feeling you have when you follow God. That closeness and adoration of His awesome power. But I did not have it.

And last night, I had an epiphany. I don't really know what made it happen. I was sitting on my bed, waiting for my friend Kai to text me after he got out of show choir camp. It hit me that I was more excited about getting a text then about opening God's word. And my life shouldn't be like that.

I learned at camp that my life should be devoted to God. My every breath comes because God allows me to breathe. It is not fair for me to spend all day excited about a boy texting me but then put off my quiet time because I did not feel like doing it.

Every girl or boy or even adults can struggle with this. I struggle with this so often and I know I can't be the only one. I may love to talk to Kai or Davey or Logan or Ellie or Abby or my mom. But I can't love talking to them more then I love talking to God. God saved my life! He allows me to go to heaven and not to hell. He is the reason I'm alive.

And as I sat there on my bed, shocked at how utterly selfish I was, I texted my friend for help. Elizabeth, my counselor from camp. I texted her this message: "I want to make God the focus of me life. I want to. So badly. But I can't and I don't know how to fix it. Can you help me in anyway?"

I kid you not, the second I sent the text it was life a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I realized something. God just wants me to try! I wasn't trying before! I may have thought I was trying, but I wasn't. The reason my heart wasn't in it was because...it wasn't! I hadn't taken that first step and asked for help. I had begged God for a closeness that I really didn't want. I just knew I needed it. So I asked for it.

But then, after I asked for help from Elizabeth, I knew that I wanted it more than anything. Because feeling far away from God isn't something I wanted to feel. God is so much more important than boys, friends, reading, work, food, sleep, or anything you can come up with! I had been unwilling to take that first step until I realized that I was so attached to things of this world.

So I'm planning on turning over a new leaf if I can. I'm trying to read through the entire New Testament at the moment. It's not even close to the size of a Harry Potter book and I was going to try to re-read the last book before Friday morning. So why not read the Bible? Because we think its boring? Its not!

So...that's what I'm trying to do. I'll post updates hopefully.

Thank you for reading. If you did. I hope that this can help you like it helped me. Just remember. Stay strong. Stay safe. Stay with God. :)

Until Canadians stop saying "eh",

Adeline Taylor

Christ walks on this Island, will you meet Him here?

Well, I promised that I would re post my list and say how it went. I'm just saying, Word of Life Island is the best place on earth. I met and was reunited with so many interesting and wonderful people this year. It was probably my best year I've had.

Although, I did not complete every thing on the list as I promised I would.

1. I did see Vito. In fact, I saw A LOT of Vito because I hung out with him most of the week and became very good friends with him. I've known him since I was ten or eleven by the way. I miss him about as much as I miss Kai. Which is a lot.
2. I saw Nicole only twice, but she was as great as ever. I miss my big sister.
3. I saw Taylor every day. She worked for the Medication Station so she was at every meal. Thank goodness I never actually had to go to the infirmary for a real injury.
4. I saw Shannon every day because she was my counselor!!! :D
5. I saw Elizabeth everyday because she was my counselor as well. :)
6. I saw Joseph only twice. Because he was working across the lake on the children's camp.
7. I did make a lot of friends. (And also several enemies because of the friends I made.) Lake, Victoria, Adrienne, Vito, Kai, Devin, Hunter, Jables, Jon, Ginger, Heather, Amber, Green Lantern, Will, Adam, Blaise, Steve, etc. etc.
8. Our cabin gave up on trying to win cabin of the week on account that it took too much energy and time to impress the program guys. Plus, who wants to cheer their heads off every meal just to win a stupid party barge? I'd rather have fun during the week.
9. I got 3rd place in my web site. I also got 5th place in poetry. I did not place in my short story though.
10. I became well known as Twix the Monkey, Fez Girl, Nerd Glasses Girl, and the girl who followed Vito and Kai. What can I say? I'm pretty awesome.
11. I spent everything but two quarters and the lucky penny our youth leader gave me.
12. I FAILED!!! I did not do a meal time challenge. At all. Lucky me.
13. Adam, Blaise, Chung Day, and Steve
14. I helped uproot a tree. Does that count as as encouraging my sense of daring?
15. I ate almost everything. It was GOOD. 
16. I did. Once. Because then we found out we weren't allowed to chill there. 
17. Um...epic fail. But I'm sort of glad I failed at this one. I liked two guys. One of them is now basically my coolest friends and one of them is basically tearing my heart in half because he lives in Indiana. But they are both coming to my sixteenth birthday party in January. So I'm excited. And against popular belief, and my own belief, they WILL show up.
18. I am NOT a Vito and Kai groupie. I am their friend. All you stalkers freak me out and tried to kill me!!! I did not stalk anyone.
19. Gave my ticket for paint ball away to someone so I could hang out with Vito and Kai. 
20. I hung out with the guys from my church everyday and became friends with the guys in their cabin.
21. AVOIDED EVERY SPORTS TOURNAMENT!!! Although I did watch a few.
22. I did dress out every day. Jungle day, nerd day, tacky day, and dress your counselor day 
23. FAILED!!! I did not write everything down... 
24. I did go tubing and it was AWESOME
25. I thought I was going to die in the motel. It was so scary.  
26. I did not die. Thank God. I thought I would sometime.
27. FAIL. I did not get inspiration for my book. 
28. I did learn a lot about God. I learned that God's love for me never changes. Nothing I do can change how much he loves me. I know that he never changes. I know that his plan for my life is perfect. I know that I need to stay in his hands and never try to leave. His plan is perfect and I just need to follow it. Follow his laws no matter how much it hurts. 
29. I listened in Bible Hour everyday. Although I did almost fall asleep a few times.
30. I did have fun doing everything. Even when I was crying. Even when I was leaving. I had an AWESOME TIME!!!
31. Her name is Angie and she scares me even though I know her.
32. FAIL! I did not prank call anyone. 
33. Not only did I sing veggie tales songs with Abby at the top of my lungs I also sang many songs from musicals, the Creep, and several other hit songs.
34. I didn't need to stage the light saber battle. It happened. And I totally won!!! 
35. I participated in the Vito magic show...so yes. I did.
36. With Vito, Kai, and Abby? Of course I did something crazy everyday!!! 
37. My cabin did prank someone. We hung Sophie's Cabin's Justin Beiber cut out from the ceiling. In a noose. It was awesome. 
38. We bribed the people almost everyday and we got really good scores on our cabin.  
39. I lost my fedora. And cried. Hard. It was really sad.
40. I didn't hang out in the Pub. I stayed outside even when it was pouring. I hung out in there once because Kai and I were hiding from Kai's stalker. 
41. Easiest thing to do on the list. ;)

So, obviously camp was awesome. I miss everyone so much. It hurts more than normal, which is weird. I had an awesome time.

My month is so busy. On Friday I leave for Pennsylvania. I get two days to recuperate. Life is AWESOME.

Until the sidewalk ends,

Adeline Taylor

Don't Say Goodbye

There's a way of saying goodbye
Without saying it at all
You just run
You hide from those you love
So you don't have to say goodbye
You stay far away
No matter how much it hurts
No matter how hard you cry
You just run because your scared
Scared of loosing them
Scared of never seeing them
Scared you said too much
Scared you never said enough
Cause life just won't be the same
But life shouldn't ever be
Life moves on and on
And its a vapor
So make use of the time you have
Cause you'll never get time back
You just can't
Cause life just goes like that

To Vito, Kai, Jon, Ginger, Lake, Adrienne, Victoria, Hunter, Devin, Candace, Nicole, Shannon, Elizabeth, and any other people I met at camp who I haven't mentioned.

So I am off of camp property now. I am still in New York visiting my cousins though. I really wish I was home but my cousins are pretty fun to hang out with. Its going to be a good few days. I'm still missing everyone. A lot. But its better now that I've gotten  a decent ammount of asleep.

I'll post a follow up to my previous post later, so that I can check  off the checklist and tell you all how it went. Let me just say, it was awesome. I can't wait till next summer.

Until Ihop doesn't taste good anymore,

Adeline Taylor